Today is the 5th day of Ramadhan. How's your fasting going so far people? :) I hope all is great and well xo
Now you may have been wondering why there are an awful lot of emo stuffs going on with me lately. Enough for me to say, being lied & cheated to are not my favourite thing. Then being labelled by so many names are just worst.. I like a friend's quote on Facebook, "I never expect people to understand what I'm feeling, so really I don't expect people to bitch about it like they know so well". Thank yous Filzah Razak. Her quotes on life and her random words are quite inspiring I would say. I don't know her well, but I like reading almost any words that she wrote whether on Myspace, Facebook and her blog ever since the glorious days of Myspace. Well, not in a stalker-ish creepy way of course lol. I suck at words. I do wish my words are just like hers. It's mean, but at the same time, it's not in a mean kind of disgusting way where people would think that you're a jerk of somekind. It's mean, sharp, and just get straight to the exact point of what you're feeling at that moment without being too obviously emotional. And the fact that she's a few years younger than me, makes feel even more awed by it. I'm not sure if there's a word 'awed' in the dictionary :p
Anyways, what I'm really trying to say in this entry is that, when you're feeling down and sadly, you don't know else where to look at, how to push away what you're feeling, the negativity, try this: Urge yourself to stop looking at things that builds the negativity inside you and be thankful of the things that you have (not had) in your life, currently at the moment. I found this advice to be truly useful for me. Be near to those who keeps you feel blessed and focus on the happiest things instead of the sorrows. There will be times where you will think back of the upsetting things that happened. Be sad, but get back up to your feet fast and don't let it get to you.
There are lots of things that you might be thankful for. For me, I'm thankful that I still have my parents together, near with me and a sister that made me feel like I'm not living alone. Though she can be annoying at times haha. How annoyed we are with each other, we don't insults each other and there's no serious drama that caused my parents to worry too much, cry etc. We stayed out of trouble. I'm thankful that I have true friends which I can be crazy with. Though my friends are not that many, but I'm blessed to have them in my life :) they're the sweetest things I could be with anytime of the day (or night).
Then, there's this someone special, though it's too early for me to conclude anything yet. But he's more than friends of course. We started off as friends. I admit he's not the too romantic type where his words could melt your brains off. Not the typical type of guy where he would be there texting you every hour of the day, and he doesn't bad mouthed people even though how bad I perceived them as. But what really makes me feel thankful is that, in the darkest moments of my life, Allah sent him as a little piece of happiness that gives me the bright side of all the darkest side of things. I'm grateful that he's a Muslim and for his faith.
Now everytime I think of the sorrows that I'm still holding, I think hard to be thankful of what I have and how Islam is the way of life. My life :)